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Monday, 25 July 2011

How to avoid a Facebook faux pas

Online social networking such as Facebook are open to constant public scrutiny. Online social networking such as Facebook are open to constant public scrutiny. Photo: Louie Douvis
The unique conditions created by Web 2.0 have prompted the need for an etiquette reboot, writes Katie Cincotta.
WHAT'S the worst thing that could possibly happen to you on Facebook?
1. Your boyfriend dumps you in one swift status change, publicly breaking your heart in front of 428 people on your friends list.
2. The boss catches you out on a "sickie" after finding photos of your big, boozy weekend plastered all over your profile.
3. An old high-school buddy with whom you lost touch tracks you down and keeps pestering you to come and meet his wife and four kids. Oh, and he's also joined Amway.
Thanks to the explosion of online social networking, the "sticky situations" in life's social stratosphere just became a whole lot messier. With more than 300 million Facebook users posting their life and times for all their friends — and sometimes the world — to see, the global meet and greet has become a lesson in new-age manners and misdemeanours. So what are the rules of engagement in the brave new world of cyber bonds? How do we learn the etiquette required to save us from embarrassment, professional suicide and the prying eyes of crims?
Facebook's terms and conditions might prohibit spam, bullying, harassment and content of a threatening, pornographic or violent nature but it's all the nuances in between that often fail users in the realm of instantaneous communication.
Web 2.0 specialist David Birley says the best way to avoid a Facebook faux pas is to remember that social media is a public platform with global reach.
"Five years ago, breaking up via text message was a faux pas — now that's completely normal but at least it wasn't broadcast to the world. You've got to treat social media like there are a thousand people listening to your conversation. So when you attack a person, product or service, expect to hear about it."
A recent McCrindle Research survey shows 90 per cent of web users are passive and only 10 per cent make active contributions. Birley says many of those lively commentators are gen Ys who have been raised to fight for their rights.
"A lot of what goes on in social media is social backslapping," he says. "But if somebody stands up to you and says 'That sucks' then we often don't back down and that's what's changed."
Michael McQueen, social researcher and author of The 'New' Rules of Engagement, says until we develop a behavioural code for social media, many users will simply act on impulse, forgetting the viral nature of voyeurism.
At 27 himself, the gen Y researcher says it's fair to compare exposure on Facebook with the nightly news, which users should consider when revealing private thoughts and information, including sexual conquests and holiday details that could put you at risk of theft.
"That's the level of broadcasting that's occurring, which you may not think about when you're sitting on the laptop or your iPhone," he says. "If someone else puts a post on a friend of mine's wall, I can see that even though I don't know them, so that's where it becomes dangerous, because you have that knock-on effect."
McQueen's training consultancy, The Next Gen Group, believes mentors such as teachers and bosses should be wary of adding students and employees as friends, which can blur the boundaries of a professional relationship.
"Facebook is not appropriate for making the connection between mentors and mentees," he says. "There is no structure, control and accountability and it borders between personal and professional."
He warns young people to consider the consequences of a third-party enterprise having permanent ownership of content they've shared online.
"What we're seeing with gen Y is an almost pathological need to connect — that's incredibly positive but there are also huge dangers. Some are shooting themselves in the foot by putting up a YouTube video at 16, then at 21 they might be going for an internship at a law firm and recruiters are searching for and finding this stuff. Because someone else owns that content, you have no control over the branding of yourself as a person."
McQueen's rule of thumb for assessing whether something is kosher to run on your social networking page is to ask: "Would you be comfortable saying or showing that if your boss or your grandmother was in the room?"
"If the answer is no, you might want to be selective about who you let see that," he says.
Birley adds that while good manners should transcend media platforms, the anonymous nature of the web has driven free speech to daring new heights.
"People who understand good commonsense etiquette are going to understand good commonsense etiquette online. But extremists are everywhere and even social media has its 'haters'."
A case in point was the recent pro-rape group set up by University of Sydney students, which ran for several months before Facebook shut it down.
Birley says because social media has become so big so fast, as a society we haven't had time to reflect on the impact of our interactions in this dynamic new space.
"We've seen technology leap ahead so fast and the rules of play haven't kept up. We've got this massive gap with the way we're communicating and that gap is where the misunderstandings and the relationship breakdowns and cyber bullying is happening, because we don't have a code."
Unless education institutions start running Facebook 101 courses, it seems netiquette across social networking sites will continue to be about trial and error.


Read more: http://www.theage.com.au/digital-life/how-to/how-to-avoid-a-facebook-faux-pas-20100120-mk8h.html#ixzz1TBNFmVTv

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